I had a boyfriend some time back and even though he had an open mind about a lot of topics and a wide interest in a lot of things, he was boring.
He never did anything spontaneous, it was always supposed to be on schedule with him. There was nothing mysterious about him and he was predictable and too self-conscious.
Eventually after three months, I called it quit.
This experience led me to ponder about how bad guys get ladies at their beck and call and the nice guys end up getting ditched even after being ‘perfect’.
Over the years, you notice that ladies are generally attracted to the bad guys. Yes, we know they have an ugly past they are trying to get away from or are still in but it’s always fun with them.
It feels like a package that has to be unraveled every time you are with them. You won’t get them to be open about everything they have done, and some wouldn’t even mention it at all for fear of getting dumped, but someway somehow, you manage to find out. This further aggravates your excitement.
Relationships with them more often than not won’t end up in marriages, and more ladies realise that, after all the fun, they are faced with the reality or they just discover secrets that they can’t live with in the long run.
In the book, For young men only by Eric Rice and Jeff Feldhahn reveals that more ladies are attracted to some of the good qualities of the bad guy. “Almost all girls have certain positive qualities like confidence, adventure and protection among others in bad guys that really capture their attention”.
Relationship Expert, Kwesi Asiedu listed some qualities of both and why women tend to go with the bad guy. He said, “the bad guy is not scared to initiate a conversation, he does not care what other people think of him and a girl feels protected because she knows a bad guy will fight for her should trouble come her way. They are not afraid to be naughty and would confront the woman if need be. Everyone roots for a guy like that.
Good guys on the other hand, portray different qualities. They can’t hold a conversation, tend to talk about the same things over and over, they always agree with her and has no confrontation with her because they don’t want to hurt her”.
After briefly interviewing a section of the public, here’s what they had to say.
Nana Yaw Reidman, 27 who is a banker was of the view that women normally hang out with bad guys because of the fame they might enjoy while they are with them, even though they know the relationship would not end anywhere.
Philip Danso, 28, a gadget specialist could not agree more with Nana Yaw and added that women temporarily date the bad guy and after it all, they come running back to the good guy.
Papa Kwesi Donkor, 30 an operations manager said that women tend to be more adventurous, enjoy the glitz and glamour, the fame and most of all the attention. These usually don’t last but for the time being the woman is engulfed in it.
Some however disagreed with this claim. Tommy Melvin, 26, a physician Assistant said that women are not attracted to bad guys. They normally just fantasize about it or just be with them for fun sake but not the real thing.
“In reality, the good guy wins in the end. The bad guy falls short when it comes to providing women with a satisfying and fulfilling relationship that they are looking for”. This is what Selorm Tsao, 25, Businessman had to say.
Also, Fred Boafo, 35, Lawyer opined that we should look at the long-term goals and definitely good guys fit in there.
I personally feel that all good guys have an element of the bad boy traits but if you are too self-conscious to show these qualities, you will absolutely lose to the bad guy.